My first thoughts were of the "Happy Days" episode where The Fonz was giving Potsie and Ralph dating advice. He was having them do "lip-ups" on the side of the pinball machine. They were practicing for a date. Perhaps this woman was doing same?I was riding the bus home from work and where the bus turned onto Gratiot heading North - there was a bum peeing right into the street.
Then one time when I carpooled with a coworker, we were driving home from work on I94 East and were in bumper to bumper traffic. I looked at the car next to us and the woman driving - she was alone - was --- oh, I call it - practicing oral sex on a half peeled banana. She was NOT biting portions off and eating them. Her tongue and mouth were...well you get the picture! I told my friend to take a look and we both watched her "performance" for a couple of miles till traffic started moving. The woman was so intent on what she was doing she never saw us looking at her.
I think maybe that was when the word "multi-tasking" came into my vocabulary.
Yep, I remember seeing that a few times. I was recently giving a tour of the city to my friend from Cincinnati. Despite visiting many cities across the U.S and Europe he was surprised by the open gross behavior of some individuals. I mean you'll find public urination in all places, but usually its concealed to back alleys and trees in parks, etc. I feel like every time I'm in Detroit I'll see at least one person pissing inside the bus shelter. Also because of the lack of activity downtown that produces good smells to counteract the bad ones, many streets just smell like piss in general. When people say "Detroit smells like piss," I respond with, "I know."I didn't really wanna post this, but I will.
For about a week in early April on Westbound I-96 around Grand Blvd, there was the remains of a dog presumably struck by a car. The dog had been decapitated, and its head was resting on its base, facing oncoming traffic. I figured with the City's public service record it would sit on the road all summer, but it was cleaned up in about a week. Definitely gross, and pretty sad, too.
Well, here's one from days gone by that you youngsters really should have experienced.
Hygrade used to have a rendering plant on Michigan up around, oh, 18th street or so. They processed all the left-over meat products into god-knows-what, and the odor from the place could be smelled along Michigan all the way from 14th almost to the Boulevard on a damp, foggy night. The place was torn down about 1965 or so, but when I pass by the area, my nose still thinks it smells that most unique odor.
Eastern Market slaughterhouses
Watching a city council meeting on TV, makes me regurgitate my dessert.
Not sure. The guy was going whatever he was doing with these ladies behind a filthy dumpster in a back alley. I don't think there was much concern over much of anything going on with that arrangement.
A most horrendous caterpillar infestation when I was a kid. The front porch was covered with them, my mother desperately needed something from the store and my father was at work It was one of those days I was glad that I was not the eldest child.
It was also one of those days where it was good to be a girl. My oldest sister just waited at the front door until one of the boys she knew passed by. He went and got a broom and cleared a path for her and dutifully waited until she returned from the store to make sure she had a clear path back into the house.
Hotdogs!
Attachment 992
Attachment 991
Two gross things I've seen in Detroit - both many years ago.
Riding home on a DOT bus watching a cockroach crawl in and out of the pockets of a girls coat. And praying I wouldn't loose sight of it before I could exit the bus!
My mother yelling for me to come out into the alley with the big broom and the hose. The whole alley was crawling with maggots! Our ex-con neighbor across the alley had shot his wife's little poodle and just dumped it in the garbage can in the alley. Took my mom hours to get someone to come out and deal with the situation.
I have a lot of gross stories from my telephone installer days in NW Detroit, but this one's up there. I was installing a wall phone in a very filthy kitchen. A 6-year-old kid wandered in and proceeded to make himself a bowl of cereal. He opened the sugar bowl and a bunch of roaches scooted away from it. Not missing a beat, he whacked as many as he could reach with the back side of his spoon. He then proceeded to use the same spoon to put sugar on his cereal and then eat it. I just about barfed.
A fast-food oil/grease tanker truck overturned and spilled part of its contents nearby where I worked about 10 years ago, and apparently every vehicle and that got within "smelling distance" of the accident soon pulled off the road so that its occupants could get out and retch up the undigested contents of their stomachs . Fortunately it was mostly cleaned up by the time that I got off work, and the odor was still detectable but very weak. Several of my co-workers had gone out to lunch and were victims. They told me that the used grease was the most powerful and gut wrenching stench that they had ever come in contact with.
When I was a very young child living in Detroit, I was walking down an alley that ran parallel to Gratiot one hot summer afternoon, and there was several flattened rats that had been run over by a truck, and their guts were smeared all over the pavement, but they looked like they were moving, I bent down to get a better look and the "moving" was caused by thousands of maggots..ewwww!! My first look at both dead rats and maggots was something I never forgot.
Last edited by Flanders; May-04-09 at 05:10 PM.
Welcome back, Black Soul.
This isn't exactly an EWWWW situation in the traditional sense of the word, but it is funny and seeing it had an element of ewwww. I was riding the Woodward Express bus home [[to HP back when it was nice) when we stopped in the New Center area right near the Art Center. I happened to notice a heavy set middle age lady running like mad for the bus in front of it. Unfortunately for her, it was quite windy and her wig suddenly sprouted wings and flew....right into the bus window and landed in the drivers lap. Poor guy let out a scream and jumped a good 2 feet, lol.
This isn't exactly an EWWWW situation in the traditional sense of the word, but it is funny and seeing it had an element of ewwww. I was riding the Woodward Express bus home [[to HP back when it was nice) when we stopped in the New Center area right near the Art Center. I happened to notice a heavy set middle age lady running like mad for the bus in front of it. Unfortunately for her, it was quite windy and her wig suddenly sprouted wings and flew....right into the bus window and landed in the drivers lap. Poor guy let out a scream and jumped a good 2 feet, lol.
Your bus story helped me recall one of the more embarrassing times in my life. At the end of the school year our 8th grade class was scheduled to go to a daylong trip to Camp Dearborn. The night before, I stayed overnight at a classmates' home and whatever his mother made for us for dinner apparently did not agree with me. As our class traveled in a chartered bus on the way there, I suddenly became very sick to my stomach. and knew that I was about to puke.
I walked up to the front of the bus and asked the driver to pull off the expressway.because I was sick.and I must have looked as white as a sheet, but he ignored me, and after I continued to plead with him, the prick told me to return to my seat. I almost made it back to my seat but then dived into a seat row that a pair of my classmates were sitting in, slid open the bus window, and let loose...
The bus was in the middle lane on the freeway, and it was busy, so a couple of cars' windshields in the next lane were splattered with my rather prodigious amount of vomit, enough that the drivers had to turn on their windshield wipers...LOL!!
Looking back, I almost wish that I would have barfed instead all over that jerk bus driver, but he might have lost control of the bus.
Last edited by Flanders; May-04-09 at 06:02 PM.
The open tandem semi trailer trucks hauling entrails from the slaughter houses on Russel to the Wayne Soap rendering plant on a hot summer day back in the day.
Body parts washing up at the Detroit WasteWater Treatment Plant.
Monica Conyers French Kissing Donald Lobsinger.
Probably 10 years ago or more, my wife and I were leaving the Masonic Temple after whatever show we seen. We had to walk around the side of the building to get to where we parked. There is a ledge along the side of the building. On that ledge was the biggest rat I still have ever seen. It had to be the size of an average cat. I've seen vermin before but the "ewwww" part was that it proceeded to trot along the ledge like none of the dozen or so people around us were even there. The old saying "it is more afraid of you than you are of it" didn't apply here. I prefer my vermin to try to avoid people!
Andys frozen condom story gets my vote for Best EWWWWW Comedy.
[quote=Sludgedaddy;15424]The open tandem semi trailer trucks hauling entrails from the slaughter houses on Russel to the Wayne Soap rendering plant on a hot summer day back in the day.
Body parts washing up at the Detroit WasteWater Treatment Plant.
Monica Conyers French Kissing Donald Lobsinger.[/quote]
You're kidding, right? Isn't he an old guy?
[[And yes, I know her current husband is quite old.)
Yes...so far the frozen condom has gotten me laughing the hardest. But hopefully there's lots more "ewwwww" moments to come. Bring 'em on, folks!
This isn't just a Detroit phenom, but any pile of vomit on the sidewalk--especially if the contents are recognizeable.
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